There was a ginger baby in the car next to me. I almost totaled my car into the center divide.
I tried to assassinate the ginger baby
i have more money on itunes than i do in my bank account... college.
We planned for the zombie apocalypse. In great detail. Of course there was booze involved.
she's telling me all about the love triangles of her sims. you tell me how it's going.
I booked us a cruise for November. Lose 20 pounds and don't cheat on me before then.
She counted 5,6,7,8 then intentionally kneed herself in the eye numerous times.
Did they have a limo or was i just stoned?
YOU GOT KINKY WEIRD ICE CREAM HEAD ON FRIDAY DONT EVEN COMPLAIN.
Dave used his AAA card to get my car towed to my house so I could get drunk. Evil genius.
So did you grab that log full of poison ivy for the fire and then apparently take a piss on Saturday night too or was that just me?
will we ever learn or are we destined for a life of poison ivy covered balls?
You will never be paid again to get drunk and tell off cops without being arrested. Once in a lifetime opportunity
You're right. Fuck my job. I'm in.
Really stoned me is having a very serious, intent conversation with my mom about egg rolls and koolaid flavors.
Nothing says "forever alone" like receiving a friendship bracelet from your parents.
He said I looked like a ballsack and I tried to choke him out with my Ghostbusters pajama pants. Happy fucking Halloween.
He called me baby cakes during sex... Can U not
Randomize
