Its not drinking alone if you got Tiger on the Wii.
Then you got really excited when I upgraded you from puke bowl to puke bucket.
He's the biggest piece of shit to ever exist. He's not even wearing shoes.
im at a loss of words.... a stripper is dancing to a Justin Bieber song.
Want to come to my BBQ and Blow party?
Just erased 'masturbate' from my mental To-Do list because I've got too much stuff to do. I hate adulthood
We're watching a video in class about cheese. The scoring for it sounds like that of a Lifetime movie. My mind is creative. I've continued my own story in my head of a wheel of cheese that was raped and murdered. It's so sad. I hope they get the guy. Btw, the video is about marketing.
At one point, you closed your eyes and asked me which 'six flags' we were at
I've been at work 30 min broke a paper towel holder a chair set a box on fire and fell down twice. Hungover Brian just reached a new level
He's talking about how great of a find these dollar store condoms were. Help.
I just finished packing for spring break, took me 4 minutes. To be fair though I only put my trunks, a pair of underwear, and 50 condoms in my bag.
So when I walked out, everyone was chanting ONE OF US, someone draped a lei over my head, and then she grabbed my ass and dragged me back into the bedroom. I'd say it was a pretty good night to lose my virginity.
Sorry you felt insulted last night let me rub your butt in remorse
I think I fell asleep on the dance floor at one point...but played it off cool and acted like I just did the robot.
The report specifies "melted cheese food" as the cause of the burns. Your pride, like your cock, isn't getting out of this without heavy damage.
Randomize
