i chose cheese fries over sex for the third time this week.
My mom came into my room and told me to flip off the tv. I gave it the middle finger. Note to self: STOP SMOKING THIS SHIT
I vaguely remember telling people they were not trash cans
There are thorn wounds on my balls, don't ever question my dedication to party again
She put her phone in her underwear and it somehow managed to work it's way into her vagina. she has a BLACKBERRY.
theyre selling pepper spray in the courtyard. hellooo atl
i think i just put your shirt on , but i don't remember . my body can't decide if it wants to move in slow motion or fast forward
If she's telling you consent laws theres probably a reason
where are you?
talk to ya later, gotta sled down these stairs real quick
It really does creep me out though that the next ten years will involve my friends creating smaller versions of themselves because to be honest I don't know how much I like some of them. So that thought it really scary
Cuz I feel like I ate the whole candy isle at 7/11 last night and chased it with rum
You pretty much did tho
HahahahahaHAHAHAHAHAHAHA MY LIFE IS A CAUTIONARY TALE
I just bought six bottles of the 2 dollar vodka. oh yes there will be blood
Dont you look at me in that tone of voice
i think it’s okay to see him. you just can’t wind up with his penis in your mouth again
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