Well to be completely honest its more of a 'i wanna do things to you that your parents would not enjoy hearing about' mood
I boned her and wore a Freddy mask once. It was pretty lol
I hope you get used to having plenty of sperm because you're never gonna get any.
You thought cars couldnt see you if you stuck your head in the mail box
would he be offended if i told him that "national coming out day" is october 11. thats subtle enough right?
Just saw my father's penis. Don't know what to say.
French people screaming and throwing stuff out the window. We told the manager and he's pissed and going up there. This is gonna be like cops. Maybe better than cops.
figured you should hear this from me. Your refrigerator door is way broken. I opened it last night when i was drunk and tried to climb the shelves. i got to the one with the mustard.
I am not betting on the failure of any friend that is not you.
just walked across campus with a bottle of champagne in between my boobs. night two and the quest for classiness is already over
We're keeping you on a leash this Saint Patrick's Day
I just got a free round of shots. Don't you DARE fuckin tell me that A-cup boobs can't get you good things.
Should I apologize to him for saying I wanted to punch him in the face as I was digging through the trash?
On a scale of 1 to hungover I’m definitely throwing up at the office today.
My vagina! What have you done to it?
Blessed it my child.
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