Btw the nut in my hair goes great with my outfit !!! :(
i mean he wasn't bad looking, but i wouldn't have slept with my professor if i knew everyone would get an A
His dick was poking my bladder. That big...
just had a memory of me telling homeless mark that it was the year of the bunny and he said "you da bunny, girl"
No he didn't understand the sequence...then I started texting him these texts with vagina strategically spelt correctly in jumbles of letters.
thank you for letting me use your house as a brothel.
I was so drunk, I was kissing everyone. Their sexual preference was none of my concern.
We didn't even make it to the door before they came out saying we weren't allowed in because of last time..
They made the rule if I caught the ball with my cleavage they would drink the entire beer pong table. I don't think they expected me to actually do it.
Just bought weed from the ice cream man. The kid in front of me got a tootie fruitie.
I don't want any of this. I just want big sausages.
I've got to stop being so hungover that I puke in the fine establishments of this glorious town.
so evidently blowing a guy does not mean he will say hi to you when he sees you in class.. in case you're ever wondering
I remember reading the word "lift" so I did. The alarn went off, and I thought to myself "what dumbass pulls the fucking fire alarm?" and then I realized it was me...
The whole country is going to hell in a handbasket but I got a grade A fucking and don't particularly care.
Randomize
