I am in a vortex of obligation.
I couldnt find her vag and just started laughing uncontrollably. She was not pleased. Neither was i.
there was a guy here who managed to get his head stuck in a fishbowl. no, I don't fuckin know how
She threw up all over when she was giving me dome. Not even gonna lie, it felt really good.
my facebook is like a giant collection of my one night stands
Someone else needs to become the bad example in our group
But you wear shame so well
Hey, I got 20% of the people home that I was responsible for. I can't be expected to do much more.
Though I feel a moral obligation to take you there, point out all of the male supervisors and slap you on the wrist and yell, "NO!!"
Hey he's not bad, although he did have a glass eye
This is how baked we were last night. Our drinking game: We stare at each other; first one to laugh drinks.
is leaving the club to fk in his friends van subtle?
But in defense of this shit summer we've had, I totally perfected my shotgunning skills. I have achieved my summer goal.
I told him we could fuck whenever was concurrent for both of us
FML I accidentally sent the text about his bruised balls as a group text that included his brother and my boss.
I was left to my own devices with nothing to do but drink
Randomize
