ppl dont tell me stories about anal. apparently im not a tell-me-stories-about-anal kind of person
This just in: Jon Gosselin's address-The Alexandra. I bet if we showed up he'd date us.
lets put it this way..we'd win on tool academy
As I was going down on her I noticed she had a tatoo on her inner thigh that said "Eat it like your birthday cake".
Not to make her into that kind of girl, but she did have a condom mural
Prepare for tons of dick. I mean dick by the bucket loads. Waterfalls if cock.
Jen gave my number to some guy she met in NY. He sent me a picture of his weiner. He had nice shoes. I replied with a pic of bacon.
When in doubt always reply with bacon.
She looks like she smells of sausage, sunblock and sorrow.
Friendly reminder that on the walk home you tripped but instead of falling to the sidewalk, you tried to save it and ended up headbutting my ex-boyfriend in the balls. ILU.
I don't think a gay three way is the best way to confirm your sexuality.
If you could not mention to him that I slept with his best friend, that'd be cool of you.
I knew it was love when he told me he wants to see me have multiple orgasms in one night
If its not for food we ain't going out.
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
I feel like my entire body is ashamed of me today
You're a god amongst men today
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