Until that no good dick sucking whore stays away from my boyfriend I am gonna start blowing all of his friends...
Only in Montana can you find Septic Services that would display "Christian owned and operated" on the side of the truck. I'm oddly going to miss this state.
dude, osama threatened the US again
dude. i slept with your sister last night
what?
I saw that as an opertune moment to drop some big news
hey, we don't wanna leave the house because we're watching fireworks on tv. this is america.
I tried to go shot for shot with some guy called "shit show martinez"
i walked in on him listening to enya, jacking off, and vomiting into a cup on his desk. are you serious.
i walked toward the cop car thinking it was the liquor store lights nd by that time it was too late to escape the trap
This is the second time in a week I've woken up with your bra in my bed and I've had to sit and think about how it happened.
Cops busted the party. A kid dressed as a dinosaur tried to crawl out the bathroom window but his tail got stuck. It took 3 cops to pry him out.
I couldn't find pants for like 20 minutes so I was butt ass naked just sitting on your floor
I just had sex with the male version of myself. looks, mindset, even our boob to dick ratio was the same
He literally lured me in the house with his cat then we ended up fucking on the living room couch while the cat just sat there and watched
i think it’s okay to see him. you just can’t wind up with his penis in your mouth again
You can accomplish quite a bit with a can do attitude and a well placed ice cube.
He had a temporary tattoo of Justin Bieber on his dick and I still had sex with him
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