Yeah, we realized keeping you in a cage wasn't beneficial to us
i do not condone bathtub ky wrestling
this is hardly the first time i've been told i'm dressed "too suggestively" for 7 in the morning.
He said he loved me so I pretended not to hear it because I don't think "I love your penis" was the response he was looking for.
Using our apartments online floor/space planner to see how many beer pong tables we can fit. Dont think they had this in mind when they put this thing online.
Probably not lol but were fitting as many as possible
Also I just had a flash back ... He told me I have nice nipples and then asked me about yours..
I don't get hangovers. Except once. And there is a massively epic story behind that, involving so much alcohol I should have died, and 13 raw hotdogs.
SHUN THE NONBELIEVERS. THUS SAYS THE NIPPLE LORD
Sorry i vommed in a cup next to u w out warning.. Actually im not that sorry cuz i didn't spill a drop LIKE A PRO
I need to stop acting like a drunk bitch. People are going to get the right idea about me...
Girl in my public speaking class just gave a speech on weaves, God I love community college
Walked into the bathroom and saw a Minion eating out Harley Quinn so this Halloween will be hard to top.
I think I've done enough damage with my vagina as of late, thank you
this potential sugar daddy just sent me a photo of him butt naked in the woods saying he wants to "grow our spirits together." so i think i found us a new drug dealer!
I'm actually on the verge of cancelling a booty call because I have an early meeting tomorrow. If this is what adulthood is going to be like, I'll pass.
Randomize