Omg. It looks like a crack pipe exploded in your mouth.
wait so...it's like an actual thing to masturbate using the detachable shower head? WTF I thought I was being creative!
cant help it. i get a boner every time that shake weight infomercial comes on
Apparently I spent my 300 dollar tax return by ordering ramen on amazon last night. Please tell me this will somehow pay off in the long run.
Maybe I should forgo underwear.
This is a family BBQ no?
Stop treating my vagina like a slapchop.
Sorry there's no emoticon for I got my period all over a guy's bed so I had to improvise. There isn't even a bed one
He got naked and made a run for the door so I had to stop him.
Thanks for the Beyonce article. In other news, I just passed a man with the state of Florida tattooed on his face.
When confronted with a choice of going home or fucking the band ALWAYS FUCK THE BAND!!
So i just remembered that thing i use to do with your butt because of shark week.
The bar tender had his entire hand down your asscrack.
I forgot about that. I was in MULTIPLE dimensions.
Dad smells like hangovers and 65 years of bitterness
I just got the high sucked out of me. Fuck.
Don’t eat the Doritos. Jeff was eating them while he was watching porn
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