I'm saving my limes so I'll know how many drinks I've had.
I do the same thing, but I use ice cubes.
i'm chasing tequila w mint flavored ice cream, phil's chasing it w cream cheese, bashar's chasing it w pickles...i think we all know who the winner is....
at a party and just made O-H-I-O out of dicks and vajayjays...i hope someone took a pic i was too busy (; GO BUCKS!!!
too bad being hungover isnt a job. just threw up from 9am to 5pm
She is sleeping in a dress because she's too drunk to put "real clothes" on
i just got painted green i'm not about to leave for anything
We're smoking a joint the size of the average penis right now. I may not survive.
I can neither confirm or deny any bear related allegations right at this time.
Mango bong: no go. Guava bong: sweet flaming buddha it was delicious. I shall teach you the ways of tropical fruit trees.
He bought my favorite ceral.. I've guess I've earn the status as one of his regular fuck buddies. I feel honored and proud. His roommates girls don't get this treatment.
When I left you were in the shower in your socks throwing up screaming it was blood but it was "ok" cuz it's recyclable. By the way it was kool aid.
Don't bang him. The amount of Jack Johnson he listens to is embarrassing for even a white person.
So neither of us had a dollar bill and we couldnt find a straw so we spent all nite doing coke through penne pasta
To be honest, waking up to 20 naked people in my house was not the weirdest thing to happen to me in the past 24 hours
I HAD TO PAY A COVER FOR THE FIRST TIME LAST NIGHT. My tits didn't get me in and I was so pissed.
Randomize
