It was at that point the crowd that gathered realized i wasn't getting arrested, and passed the sobriety tests. I got a standing ovation from 25 strangers
i just peed in a port a potty and wiped with my credit card statement. fuck yeah!
You had me at "you have a nicer rack then her"
but then i turned into a human whiteboard because i thought it was a good idea to bring out markers
Some one left their pants in the elevator.
There's a lady here with a big bag of dildos. I'm not sure that's appropriate bar baggage but, I like her style
laying on floor next to bathroom with vent on to give myself comfort and remind me that im not going deaf. what did i smoke?
During sex his mom asks from the other side of the door, "Do you like avocados?" Who doesn't like avocados?
Hold your horses dude. Titty pics are a work of art.
You had a fry stuck to your face... Every five mins you would wake up, take a bite, put it back then fall asleep again...
I forgot her safe word. It was a rough night.
Then again I went over his house after not hanging out since kindergarten and tried to fuck him so maybe I'm partially to blame here
for future reference, singing eye of the tiger outside my door while i am having sex makes me incredibly uncomfortable
apparently not uncomfortable enough for you to stop
It's not just going to appear. A lot of blood, sweat, tears, and leg work went into finding a cock that amazing!
The whole country is going to hell in a handbasket but I got a grade A fucking and don't particularly care.
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