idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
maybe touching the ground while going 70 wasn't such a great idea after all..
Life Lesson Number 76: Masturbating into a sock is useless if there is a hole in it.
The lack of respect you have for your penis baffles me. I'd rather rub my ball sack on public toilet seats than stick my dick in some of those girls.
A simple 'no' would have sufficed
The Fresno prostitute seemed offended all I wanted from her was directions back to the freeway.
Just found puke on my backpack while sitting in class. It's like this weekend won't leave me alone.
uh, 3 redbulls and 400mg of caffeine pills and i still feel like life is in slowmotion..lets not take tranquilizers again.
I bought new panties to console myself ... you know, because I am going to lose my ovaries. Well, if I don't die of a heart attack first. But at least when the EMS folks find me, I'll be finely dressed from the waist down.
I just really hate taking care of things... If I can't fill it with liquor I'm not sure what to do with it.
I fucked her ex bc she fucked mine but now we're cool and I'm watching her dog this weekend
So my POF profile is full of Archer references. Only guys who get them will be getting any response to their messages.
You know it's a pretty bad night when an injured penis is not the worst thing that happened to you. Fuck tequila
Usually it's tequila, or vodka. But today was just the devil
In case you were wondering I realized something last night, Rick James was correct. Cocaine is a hell of a drug.
I think I may have gotten way too used to using my boobs as an extra hand/pocket...almost stabbed myself in the chin bc I forgot I put my fork there
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