i fell asleep on him beating off on webcam last night, i'm such a great boyfriend.
It's like a choose-your-own-adventure. But the adventure is already chosen for you. And it sucks.
you handled that situation with as much grace as someone puking involuntarily could
You have no idea how much I'm praying for my moms side of the family's infertility right now
I'm considering failing out of my last semester of college just so I can keep fucking him.
My lips are sealed. Both pairs.
I made him leave at 3am, he texted me a couple minutes later and said the elevator was broken and he was sleeping in there, but he said I was worth it so I don't feel guilty
I lost the bet. I now have to do all chores sans clothing of any kind. I give it a week before I'm knocked up...
Drunken snow shoveling. Visiting my family is starting to become a seriously risky venture.
VOOOODKA VOOODKA WE PLEDGE OUR LOVE TO THEEEE VODKAAAA VODKAAAA SAVIOR OF LIBERTYYYY
no strings attached, like you could fuck him and then throw him off a building right after
You threw up in your own shoe then wore it home
I just watched a porn called gay of thrones and I think I've reached a new low in my life
like honestly, the vodka had to go somewhere, and your moms soap dispenser just seemed right at the time..
His dick smelled like strawberries...it was awesome.
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