Idk man, it felt like my skin was a suit and I could feel it zipping up my side and up to my mouth. And then my head felt like a ventriloquist dummy's head, with the jaw thing..it was freaky, dude
You think that's a metaphor for anything, champ?
Shut the hell up.
fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
Shiiiit I think I'm getting sick. probably had something to do with the fact that i shared my mouth with everyone last night.
Wait. That came out far sluttier than I intended.
She made fun of how I walked so I announced to her boyfriend that I have cum on her face before.
I could hear his roommate in the background imitating my sex sounds...
Couldn't see or hear that well because she hit me on the back of the head with a bat. That is my excuse. Also the gin.
Hne relally is a cite oerfect gome. Nes awddddddddooooome.
let's just say if he has a penis and he hypothetically needs to put it somewhere... i would take care of that for him.
Me and a 30 year old man are sitting in my bathtub in swimsuits drinking straight rum from the bottle. Don't tell me how fucked up your Christmas is.
The hardest part about being a child of divorce is when you're at your dad's house but your condoms are at your mom's house.
I'd just like to formally thank you for the size of your dick. The gods must really love you.
Are you feeling better yet?
I need a nap and a new butthole
I'm kinda sad I'm leaving the bank. I never got to have rough sex in the vault.
I fucked his roommate. And that roommate's best friend. And my roommate. And my roommate's old roommate.
i'm bowing down, but slow your roll.
Weird. And pubic lice are now endangered so your hairy balls can rest easy
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