i have i love cock written on my hand and a vagina drawn on my arm and i just finished eating breakfast with the whole fam for mothers day
ahah at least you got away with it
nope...my gran was the one who informed me
so basically i'm the" little sister", he's the "big brother" and we just fucked
Just found out my drug dealer is also a porn star. It's a good day.
I havnt had this much beer since i losodt my virginity. thank. god.
I'm quitting my job and I'm just going to become a professional drunk girls mistake.
I had to ask him for the scissors while I was in the shower. My hood piercing was stuck in my loofah.
The guy in the American Flag bikini was telling the women he was disgusted at the amount of alcohol they weren't drinking. Then it got ridiculous.
Code red. She won't talk to me. Maybe it has something to do with her raccoon eyes. Perry said there was a brief moment of towel fighting until you passed out. Did you draw the turtle on my ass?
Did you cry?
I don't think so. I definitely lost my cool though
Yeah i think jesus would lose his cool in that situation
His baby mama found the pictures of us, she couldn't see my face but she could see my asshole. So I'm safe.
WE HAVE WINE WHERE ARE YOU GUYS WE ARE BY THE GIANT EAGLE
I just woke up and there was a condom wrapper stuck in my hair. This is my life.
Didn't you sleepover at your grandparents?
I like the new guy, he keeps beer in the fridge.
I dunno what to tell you sport. Short of having a shock collar on, you're gonna wanna hook up with people.
the guy had "bad bitches only" tattooed above his penis...
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