It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
I'm think I may have given your ex's number to a convicted sex offender.
Win!
So I thought I was doing pretty good and then I sneezed and prematurely ejaculated...
oh, and bring over your fire extinguisher. we're gonna get the mailman again
i've lived in the woods for so long, as long as its post-op, i don't care.
Thats the last thing I remember and then I woke up in this Dutch kids dorm and he was taking a picture of me while I was sleeping
Let me start this apology by saying you were the finest piece of ass I ever had.
I've never seen a grown man cry so much after getting jerked off by a stripper. I say it's the best $600 he ever spent.
So I'm seriously not complaining - but I just fell ass backwards into a Tuesday night threesome. Sober
Two words that describe last night: naked and backflips.
Sorry I invoked the "everyones getting smacked including myself policy last night"
This chick had a microhand. Fucking, like, jerking off a baby carrot would make it look like corn.
What is the proper Father's Day protocol when you're sleeping with a guy who has kids?
we should most definitely have a fire extinguisher in the apartment. like... for sure
I mean, I'm not upset that HE's getting married, I'm upset his penis has to go through with it by default
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