So how Liz Lemon is this? I bring a boy home, we get in bed, and I realize there's a lean pocket wrapper in the sheets.
Woke up with puke in my bed and my pockets full of Tootsie Rolls.
Jealous.
I'm watching i used to be fat. I've been doing crunches for the last half hour yelling at the slut on tv to stop crying and do crunches.
Let's not refer to him as Dustin. That makes him seek like a real person, not just a dick I would like to experience.
I fcuked ip.
Is this your way of telling me that you got drunk in your office before meeting with your dissertation advisor again? Or that you finally banged that freshman fraternity pledge?
If I get over there and the april fools joke is that there's no HBO, I'm setting fire to the place.
Sarah's knitting me a hat as an apology for unknowingly making out with my boyfriend
I love it when he cheats on me with nice people
Oh yeah and one of the strippers brought you chips and water when you were passes out next to the toilet. So that was nice
Bro if you were a bird I would puke in your mouth right now
If someone told me one person in the department was secretly a death eater, I would suspect her, no contest.
Do you think they'll deliver pizza to my mouth
yes, i'm a douce. but i'm a high quality douche.
I've been getting a lot of emails from patron lately for being a great customer. Is that awesome, or should I start thinking about seeking help?
So Blakes coming home... so if youre like fingerbanging the shit out of yourself on the kitchen table...wrap it up
Someone needs to get Mark off the roof. I told you that he doesn’t shut up about ancient Egypt if you give him henny.
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