we have pet lesbian snakes
You asked the officer if he could bring you to the same jail as T.I.
So...it's hour 4 of day 5 of week 7 of my internship, and so far all ive done is shred paper. all. day. long. it's like working for Enron.
Bookstore boy and I went out, he came back here and I tried to fool around and he respects me too much blah blah I'm a predator.
whatever happens this semester dont let me be that girl yacking in the urinal. again.
Please tell me you're throwing the cats into this foot of snow.
Weird we were more concerned with sharing our germs than tag teaming the blow job?
Some guy seriously just got Jimmy Johns delivered to him at the graduation ceremony. This cannot be real life.
I'm posted up in the bathroom at au bon pain, high as balls, experimenting with eyeshadow combinations and listening to 90s jlo. The girl in the stall next to me just plopped a big one and I laughed, hope I ruined her day
I think we've had way too many heart to hearts in the Mc Donalds parking lot for this to be a healthy relationship
I feel like I got hit by a bus. A head on collision with my vag.
where will you be at 9:30 tonight?
piledriving you in your roommate's bed?
he fell asleep naked and all I'm doing is staring at his weird balls
I'm drunk listening and crying to Selena. How's your Monday?
i woke up on the floor in front of the fireplace and my last google search was "fuck sponges"
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