Sooo, his balls are like... bigger than my head...
Is it creepy to message a girl and say you had me at stocked liquor cabinet?
Got hit on at a funeral service by cougar. I think I just got Reverse Will Ferrell'd.
its totally unfair that im just as ill-prepared as a 16 year old but there's no tv show for 25 and pregnant.
If i spent $300 & took that thing home i would hate myself today.
it was such a weird mix, KFC and penis
You coming bye my yot got egg sweet carilne vodklaa
Omg you had literally better be on fire, drowning, and being crucified all at the same time to be calling me at 7:30 in the goddamn morning.
I'm ultimately at thr Shariton to drink and ppssibly puke on fancy shit. Thats my story and Im sticking to it.
Is YOLO really just a socially acceptable way to say you enjoy putting things up your nose?
How frowned upon is it to take your vibrator into the tanning bed...because Operation: dripping wet is in full swing and I have a busy schedule
The only joy I have here is being able to shit with the door open.
I am passing the whore torch on to you my friend. Do me proud
Went and sat in the wrong fucking class for 30 mins, answering questions and shit. What ever this is i will be on it for the rest of the semester.
I just had a legitimate orgy. Wearing glowsticks.
Randomize
