Martha Stewart would most definitely roll a great joint.
Considering he believes im part of the 2016 us curling team id say hes pretty drunk
He was waring a speedo fashioned out of american flag bandanas and when he got hard he said "you're such a patriot...raising the american flag like that"
also. he gave me a foot massage during 69ing when i got a cramp. he's a winner.
he threw my burrito on the ground and said im too drunk. fuck that guy.
We found her on the doorstep. Just layin down going, "I made it home!! Aren't you proud??!"
Dude, Donte totally wants it. I don't have any idea how I do it. I'm not even cool. I'm not even the hero Gotham deserves. I'm barely high. My hands are swelling. Want me to pick you up anything from five guys?
My fall semester strategy is to submit my papers with a nude selfie
You've got post-grad studies written all over you
I don't care how great the sex was, I cannot unsee what has been seen. I regret ever stalking his Facebook.
You'll be like the drunk Paul Bunyan someday with a giant grey cat
Turns out he's not a Doctor Who fan, I mumbled Alons-y as I went down on him. He asked who Alan was. No more drunk sex for me!
I just used my citation as a bookmark. Want a beer?
I feel like I hate him but his dick too bomb to hate completely
I peed outside 4 times after the bar, safe to say I had great night
Still fucking the ballerina?
She can put her legs behind her head.
Enough said
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