I just gave the bartender my number in roman numerals. If she figures it out, she's worth a shot
Girl next to me just said "as a guy I used to sweat but not I don't. it's awesome" Oh. My. God.
And "sexual slave/chef" was as it turns out not a real career choice...
I should start riding the bus again so I can drink all day
she didnt realize that i was putting on the same condom i used the night before with some other girl
If I don't at least start a parade that spirals into drunken riots then I'm calling it a fail of a birthday
Ya know, since we do have alot of sex with each other i figure i should wish you a happy valentines day
You made out with my dog and told me he tasted like a rainbow.
"So you think you can dance" turned into "so you think you can run and slide across the bar"...Jack Daniels wins
Beer bonging to Ave Maria
Some fat latino guy has these 2 fat white moms making out with each other on the dance floor
I also point out to everyone that she looks like DJ's gf on Roseanne.
Seriously. All I want right now is a 40 with a nipple on it, and a nap
I just said "I love my cat" as a hobby.
It's not just going to appear. A lot of blood, sweat, tears, and leg work went into finding a cock that amazing!
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