we went to that german restaurant and drank out of the boots. Then I threw up into one
Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
Two girls are now jumping in the ocean naked at 10 PM...and I was just starting to hate Ocean City
He held me the entire night. Not endearing kind of way. Like kidnapping or held hostage kind of way.
Isn't it statistically impossible for THAT many ugly people to be in one place at one time?
I was really stoned haha. I had sex with her while I cooked scrambled eggs.
True. I'd rather snort cocaine off a homeless guy then work on the weekend...Actually that may not be that bad.
she asked how her costume looked and all i could say was bars are dark right?
I'd say it's a shame and a disservice to the world that we can't stay drunken shitshows to infinity
They sent me to the hospital. Apparently, of the many things I said, I looked at the doctor and told him, "Wow... it's like you're a REAL DOCTOR!"
We had a threesome and he gave us bottle rockets and a lamp for our apartment
We have a lot of substance abuse to do tomorrow its sleep time
You walked up to a random girl on the street and asked her for a bite of her pizza...
Don't worry, I'm not gonna try making you Eskimo sisters with your mom
I discovered moonshine and fell in love.
Randomize
