that's the type of pussy you go to the bathroom and wack off before you fuck her, just to last longer inside of her!
Sooo, his balls are like... bigger than my head...
Instead of a promise ring i got my clit peirced, its a promise that ill always give you ass! =]
i just sold a bong and some oregano to fifth graders for sixty dollars. doing something tonight?
You just kept saying "I want my babies to look like you."
he came on my stomach and it was 1000 degrees in his car. i smelled awesome.
All I know is I had a penis in one hand a bottle of wine in the other
In the middle of getting a blow job, she looked up at me and said "this isn't the first time I've done this today"
I will most likely miss you the least and fondly remember you as Mr. "I need a minute" but really need 24 hours and 4 extra inches.
Wait you actually sent a text to your self saying “love you I miss you"?
3 words: harry potter burlesque. My life is so much more awesome than yours right now.
Sexting just isn't as much fun once you learn how bad he is in bed...
I smell like Dick and happiness
Let's be real, he was never going to be tall enough
short story short, i just screamed anal seepage in the middle of a diner.
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