Ew, dude I just walked in on my boss masturbating in the supply room at the restaurant. He didn't see me so I quickly shut the door and pretended like it didn't happen. And then literally five minutes later he came up to me and cupped my face with his hands and told me what a great employee I was. I got a promotion but I'm fucking scarred for life. I can't stop cringing.
so we'll all just be running around naked, basically. and high.
suntimes in life you find a rare opportunity, mine was bonin my gf in front of the tv
life just isnt the same w/o real world cancun
i awoke yet another morning with penis breath. ive been so generous santa has to bring me a shit ton of presents
You know your in college when you use the receipt from the liquor store as a bookmark
if we dont hook up this weekend, im doing both his roommates
Should we discuss the rug burns on my back or just save that for a separate conversation
There two guys dressed as FEMA workers with jump-suits that say "Post-Disaster Breast Examination Division"
Sometimes you just have to have sex for a Netflix password.
im just going to make a prayer circle of top ramen packets and cheap beer
Jill you already won the game by finding a dude who will fuck you in flamingo knee socks. Theres no hope for the rest of us
I broke another vibrator the other day. Abstinence is not for me.
Do toy wanna orseer frim onedof tjose plaves? Sry textimg with globes on
Gloves*
Out of all the words to correct, you chose gloves??
Longest 30 seconds of my life
10/10 so not recommended
Randomize
