Hey when you come over to pick me up in the mornin bring a camera. This is going to be legendary. Don't knock.... They might cover up
you ever wonder how lesbians feel about girls being in relationships with other girls on facebook? could it annoy them more than it annoys me?
Making pb&j crepes. Using corn tortillas. So high. I don't know if I'm offending French people or Mexican people more.
Just so you know I would totally fuck you. Does that count as a feeling?
how you manage to cockblock me from 500 miles away still baffles me.
You were demanding water from a bottle but I didn't have one..so I just took the water bottle from the hamster cage. You're welcome.
I believe I convinced two girls to makeout for freedom last night Hahaha
Who knew that "When in doubt, pelvic thrust" would end up being the best motto ever? In other news, I think I may have joined roller derby.
I just saw my 7th grade teacher at the club. We had a pretty good talk over drinks. Turns out we both like dancing on tables.
I'm sorry I tried to stab you. I just really wanted those mozerella sticks.
I walked in to you guys using a milk jug as a gravity bong
Surrounded by smaller versions of the same
Regardless I WANT TO BE YOUR SEX DISPENSARY. that is like the career I was born for.
Just passed a girl holding a jar filled with what appeared to be diarrhea
there's still a lot i don't remember, like why my iphone's nailed to your wall
I woke up in a bathtub full of green and blue Nickelodeon slime! wtf?!
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