Dude, no joke... I lost my wedding ring in some skank last night
Is there some kind of disinfectant spray people use? Why would anyone want to eat ass??
Just watched a guy pause a bluetooth convo to puke outside of esso. gotta love orangeville
I can get orange kush...
GET IT NOW! WHY IS THERE A DOT DOT DOT?!
i don't know at this point bringing the fog horn might be a good idea...
Taped crackers to the wall. Sat I'n the dryer. Bobby had to pull me out by my hair. No more.
Well, find something you can use as a snorkel and be aware of your surroundings.
Apple trackpads and semen don't mix. On the way to the Apple Store.
Ok so in the last 18 months I have now driven four different dudes into counseling. I'm like heroin with a vagina.
Just induced vomiting to put out a carpet fire.
Everyone is cheering
On a scale of 1-10 how seriously are we considering being sugar babies?
I'm about a 7.95
I just put on my phone calendar to remind me of my final child support payment in 2029
Hey, Would it be ok if me and your wife have a ladies only night and masturbated on FaceTime together?
True life: I got so drunk that i took a shower with my clothes on at 4 am...
Somehow my life has turned in to drug deals at the bar, and illegally camping on a mountain because I have no where else to live.
Randomize
