oh and i really hope miley falls off this mountain she is climbing
i knew he was a douchebag when his facebook activities were "ladeis," and "gettin crunk wit ladeis"
Some girl in the stall next to me just yelled "fuck yes i started my period!" she came out of the stall and we high fived. who am i to judge? i do that every month.
did u get his digits?
yes his name is chazbangbangbang according to my phone...
I have no idea. Next thing I know we're all down on one knee saying the pledge of allegiance and then singing I'm Proud to be an American. Then Trevor ate pizza off the sidewalk.
I don't mean to ruin your favorite Disney movie...but...we both came when Mufasa died.
Who invented hangovers? And why did I make out with him and eat an entire can of chilli mixed with hot fries while screaming "YOU ONLY GRADUATE ONCE" last night?
I figure that my generation of my family needs an alcoholic. I'll take that burden.
Ok. So let me get this straight. She treats her vagina like a clown car, yet judges me for just making out with the guy that bought all of us shots?
Shit. I'm suppose to call the bank but I'm too high to talk numbers.
literally 50% of my time being 20 has involved my genitals thus far
when we woke up this morning she was missing two teeth. the front two.
are you fucking roseanne barr in there?
Dude why can't I remember anything after walking in from my first beer bong?
It was immediately followed by your second, third, fourth and fifth
Next time we do shrooms i am finding an open field at sunrise and running through it and nobody is stopping me this time!
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