Rock
Scissors
Fuck
Besides Rainforest Cafe, there's nowhere i'd rather be intoxicated than here
i dont understand why you dont get why i love him. i opened the bathroom door and he had his penis in his right hand and a mcdouble in his left.
It's a 2 hour train ride a 7 in the morning, of course we're bringing alcohol
This guy needs to come out; I can feel him sucking my dick from across the room.
Just pissed by glowstick light. Bad idea.
Exact words that were just spoken as she was on her 6th, yes 6th piece of bread: "I'm only eating the soft and chewy inside of the bread-I am taking the crust home to feed my turtles"
I heard that clinking noise from behind me and I already knew you were whipping out a Smirnoff in class. Again.
Sweet. Well pat yourself on the back this penis just burst back into the the game and the vaginas of millions
You know I love you. I just don't love your penis.
I'm trying to get WebMD to diagnose me with a hangover
who is that guy in your bed? he looks like jesus..way to keep it festive
So, just how hungover are you?
Not at all, surprisingly.
That has to be your X-Men power.
Its nights like last night that make me want to high five my liver.
Right. Cuz nothing screams "You made it!" quite like selling your used underwear to strangers you met on the internet.
Randomize
