I really want to fuck my wifes sister.
i just wasnt prepared to have the baby of one of two french firemen. threesomes are too confusing.
Dangr zzzzzzzzone
If I interpreted our horoscopes correctly...you should be coming home with an 8 ball. Just saying.
maybe these stereotypes wouldn't come up if you would stop taking body shots off another
He raised his arm and dropped it in his sleep to smack himself awake. He knows his phone has an alarm clock right?
I think I might get 604 tattooed on my ass tonight...
omg his dad is hot
... I'm currently away at the moment. Leave a msg since I cannot express how much I can't help you stop ruining peoples lives.
I got so many dick pics last night. It was like a slideshow from heaven.
All I've done today is make sangria and wonder what the hell I'm doing with my life.
Good god, my descendants are going to be fucked.
Everyone says she blew me in the bathroom, so I believe it, I just don't REMEMBER.
There's a fly in my room repeatedly throwing itself at my window, and I feel it's really symbolic of what I want to do with my future
JB just got pulled over and I am in the trunk...... this isnt good
Remind me to do laundry tomorrow so i have something decent to take off when i get laid.
Randomize