Anthony wouldn't know good sex if it sat on his face
is it a bad thing if he can only get off when i start talking like one of the girls from Jersey Shore??
She broke up with him yesterday after she cheated on him. He's going a bachelor party next weekend. How has Homeland Security not raised the threat level?
He threw up in the campfire, the alcohol in his puke caught on fire. Im marrying this man
I just found a plastic cup with panties inside of it. Let's play CSI.
Im going to make a sandwich and see if my books came from amazon. I cant believe two years ago i was dating eight guys and teaching russian exchange students how to do shots.
I'm all about sex. But even I know there will be a time to retire my junk. And that will be my 40th birthday, or whenever I'm hideous
The cab driver was nice enough to let you finish your beer in the car, but you crossed the line when you started to pee in the empty bottle
The bouncer was just about to kick Sarah out for getting with this guy 'too physically'. I told him that was 'her style' and he let them stay. Banter.
I just KNEW this was gonna happen. NEVER say "all the free Jameson you can drink" around Tina.
Apparently when the cops arrived I was standing over him in the bathroom yelling, get the fuck up you piece of shit. Beer still in hand.
He licked my mouth. I felt like I was making out with my dog.
He's so sweet...I can't see him enjoying that I got injured during sex.
I said "one day" and that day is not today
I think I won an award for shitting and vomiting at the same time.
Randomize