Eric got herpes from Jo-ann
That's what he deserves for hooking up with a french canadian
is it bad that the first thing i do when i get downstairs is go on farm town?
We were so tired we rock paper scissored for who would be on top. I won.
I was in holding with a guy that got a DUI on a hover round. He was so nice. We're hanging out tonight.
We removed her tutu and her cape, so there's no risk of her strangling herself.
told weddin planner we wanted to work in ceremonial body shots before vows. she hasnt reponded yet...
So I'm seriously not complaining - but I just fell ass backwards into a Tuesday night threesome. Sober
So. She dumped me today.
Well, maybe you shouldn't have referred to going down on her as "Dumpster-Diving".
I've thrown up in front of nearly every customer we've had today.
BoomCity!!!
You don't have to text me that every time you have sex. I already heard you ring the gong.
We call it "Dishes: Hard Mode". Basically whoever is doing dishes gets head but needs to finish the dishes before they cum.
And so far nothing been broken!
I think there is a legit party going on the place we thought was AA
Haha idk you were stealing pizza dough at dominos
I told my mom Jesus would want me to snort drugs on his birthday
Dude, don't beat around the bush. We're fucked and you know it.
Randomize
