Do you still have your period?
It was like a drunk episode of Dora the Explorer. In English.
I just pooped in his toilet and didn't flush...I desperately need to get him past the girls don't poop phase.
imagine a blue Jetta with an ILLINOIS license plate that read JISLORD..... upon pondering it for 10minutes I came to the conclusion that J stood for JESUS and IF the license plate had enough room it would read "Jesus Is Lord"
there was so much ham clogging the tub drain.. he said it was ok he has a cleaning lady
Just promise me we won't die tonight. I can't have an autopsy report that reads "stomach contents: Tequila and semen."
i think they forgot i was still in the room... she grabbed his balls and said "i feel a fire coming on".
I have a LOT of reasons to worry about radical feminists taking my lady balls, frankly. A lot.
no, I didn't go in the end. Too hungover and hot, plus Star Wars is on so obviously I'm having a naked day.
Lmfao. We asked what you wanted to eat and you said vagina. I don't care what kind. Fresh, barbecue, roasted on a camp fire. I just want it on my taste buds.
No, you made a silk sheet toga and held up a dildo calling yourself "The Statue of Puberty". People made pilgrimages from the other party down the block to see you.
Seriously just told the plant the cheese Pringles are mine.
I will go to bed dreaming of sexy Olympians carting me on a throne to the beach where they feed me pizza and champaign and massage my head/wash it like the hair dresser does.
you stood in front of the mirror for 20 minutes and finally said, "he can hear everything i'm saying inside my head. we need to leave." now try and tell me there is no such thing as too high.
Im going for myspace 2006 goth bitch. Your worst nightmare
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