normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
I had a terrible day! The only thing that makes me feel better is knowing Jack Bauers day was worse.
She tied me up with her honor cords...
She punched my vomit. In midair. Back into my mouth.
I wonder if I could sublet my bathtub to anyone.
Nobody knows who the hobo or dude who whipped out his balls is
Do the molecules within bourbon change when mixed with a cola to form a superior liquid treat?
If I wasn't stoned and knee deep in cheese and crackers I'd help.
Hold on... Are we having an intellectual conversation about porn?
Yup
I love us.
Neither a grow-er nor a show-er. More like a no-er. If he didn't have testicles, I'm not sure you could tell he was a male, even standing there naked. There will be no second date.
Day two of not drinking, I think my cat is trying to eat me.
Psychosis secondary to sobriety???
Everyone is coupling up and I'm just excited the bartender gives me enough attention to order more shots.
THEN YOU WILL NOT GET TO SEE MY TITS TONIGHT OR IN THE NEAR FUTURE YOU HEARTLESS BASTARD
plus like he's kinda a piece of shit. a beautiful somewhat talented piece of shit that hella needs to get his life together
The bride is so wasted, she fell into her cake.I wanna be on her level
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