somehow, due in part to drug cocktail and alchl prior to meeting, i blacked out, got home, made total mess of kitchen, broke shower, and made 17 hard boiled eggs
When I was her age, Pluto was still a planet... but i said what the hell
It was laundry day and I was wearing last xmas undies. he took one look and went...you's a ho, ho, ho. my response you ask? for less dough, dough, dough. I'm a slut.
with a sacreligious after taste.
i am only reminding you that showing off your fellatio skills on vegetables is probably not an appropriate party trick
She refers to my dick as princess Sarah... oddly I'm okay with that.
I went to class with the sex aroma on me. The hot sun doesn't help much.
So I have the professor convinced that the textbook will take another week to deliver. that should give me enough time to replace the cash i spent on strippers.
Sorry 4 leaving u in the dumpster last night
Did you Fuck minivan and her friend last night?
Hate to say it and even though I definitely have a biased opinion but I'm surprised your not, sleeping with anyone else. Good personality, charisma and amazing in the sack.
Feel free to use me as a reference.
Mm. I just want to eat pancakes off of his fine ass.
I keep jumping up and down in front of the mirror naked. The only motivation I would be to stop and put clothes on is if you come over. Hurry.
I am not working on the very first day I can throw up alcohol that I legally bought and drank.
How do you say "thats kinda illegal" in thai?
My buddy just got straight up kicked out of the bar on my bday for water boarding people with beer and bar towels
Randomize
