Dude judst bought snd smokked tfour white widoew jointsd in Asmsterdam. Wstching the Cvhiefs gsme. Oh Boy.
You are why other countries hate Americans. But I say God bless you.
theyre just this beautiful family of functioning alcoholics. i want them to adopt me.
Learn some fucking English or leave me alone! "Your" is for something that belongs to you, like 'your herpes'. And "you're" is a contraction for "you are", like "you're not sleeping with me".
adderall just fell out of my nose in class. guy next to me just nodded.
You told me I was special while we were having sex and I asked why.
What did I say?
Don't ask me questions while I have an erection,
i told you the emergency thong was a good idea.
You're my spirit guide. This has to do with oatmeal cream pies.
My therapist is concerned about your alcoholism.
I can always make him wear a mask... I'll tell him it's a fetish.
Another Sunday, another 100 chicken nuggets
I dont even remember coming home... All my stuff is strewn randomly around my apartment... And I woke up at 5 sitting propped up in my bed with just my arm in a shirt
The chick who threw the party was all pissed cause she thought I made out with her boyfriend. Admittedly, I did, but she was throwing up and crying at the time so she really can't be that mad.
You tired to make us "vodka tacos". Which was just you dipping pitas in vodka.
Any good?
Well. FUCK YA. But that's beside the point
Wanna get really high and go on a Valentine's Day Sexathon cause we're both single or would that be weird?
Let's play the game let's see how long Kayla can be sober
Randomize