Robbie told me you spent 10 mins discussing the curl in his hair and that you said "with that curl in your hair, you'll go far"
I sent him a pic of my tits.. All he said was, "oh your sun burn"
i must of done something right to please the booty call gods. . . maybe fucking that fat chick?
just found a piece of pizza in my dresser.....i remember you saying you were going to save one for later so i'm assuming this is your doing
She kept biting his ear when he was talking to people, that was only 3 drinks in...
As a female I reserve the right to put my ipod in my cleavage because I have no pockets and not get judged by other girls right??
Close. The correct answer is shitting in a public toilet. We also would have accepted the pit of despair.
We're discussing which museums we should go to when we shroom. How ill would Picasso be?
You should've come to the party. It was like an identity parade of everyone you screwed last year.
I don't remember... but puking on the bar sounds like me.
Trying to coordinate a drug deal while taking a psych test is not easy.
This is worse then when all the pharmacists sang me happy birthday while I was buying plan b
Please show REO speedwagon ur boobs for me.
I'm totally going to bang the cable guy tonight. I'm so pumped
I haven't listened to news as I've been having lesbian sex all night. Anything new?
Randomize