So they call this "a walk of shame" but fuck that...this walk is fantastic. What kind of debbie downer came up with that name?
I mean we havent seen each other since december and then bam its cinco de mayo and were having sex under a life guard tower taking tequila shots between each position. no big deal
did i really just refer to you as "the mid season replacement"
He had a shameless baby voice when he was talking to my dog. There's no way I'm making it through the night with my clothes on.
nothing like a call from your drunk grandpa at midnight on a wednesday to ask your parents if you're registered to vote...
So we played the stone cold theme song and continued to chug 2 beers at once and everyone just looked in shock
I think I'm just gonna be a cat and wear slutty black clothes with some eyeliner on my face and pretend my ears got stolen by a drunk guy
He deadlifted me and I came just a little at the apex
The bump on my forehead, i think, was from falling asleep at front door, on my knees, slumped over. But we played good music so what?
That moment when a stripper is the one that makes the two of you have to define the status of your relationship...
It's a sad day when you're not really phased by the McChicken video only because you've seen weirder porn.
Its only once in a life time you get to pick your vcard swiper up from jail
Idk what's worse.... Yesterday not waking up in my bed or today waking up in the hello kitty gown.
Just used the word fistfucking in a serious conversation with my professor in front of the class, while making an appropriate and valid point. Win.
Is that strawberry winking at me??
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