I feel like abortions should bother me more
remind me to tell you about the ham sandwich empire im building
I mean come on, he's the best quarterback in the state and doesn't even know how to put on condom
you can't exactly throw up or pass out at the pentagon so i had to pull my shit together
We planned for the zombie apocalypse. In great detail. Of course there was booze involved.
I woke up wearing nothing but his lifeguard whistle..
Does making ice cubes at 4 in the morning count as being productive?
Atlanta road trip update. Jimmy fell into the petting tank at the aquarium. And freaked out. With cops now... Keep you posted
Don't matter if she's straight, I'll get her. I'm not called The Transformer for nothing
we didnt plan anything. just randomly met up in the park, both reached into our pockets and each lit up a joint without exchanging words. we're telepathic potheads.
I got my period during my acid trip. It was weird.
And I am bleeding like slutty girl #1 In a horror movie
We almost drove away from the bar with a British stranger in our trunk...
I like shiny stuff tho if that’s an emotion
first he passed out on the toilet...then hugged it and screamed no no no as i tried to pull him out
Randomize
