Ah why did you tell everyone you dragged your sac across my face!
i jus got home and totaly forgot i had nut all over the back of my shirt
..im mad u rememberd about that
iPhone photo doodle is awesome. I gave my vagina some lazers and sent it to him. He has a whole series waiting on his phone for when he gets off the plane.
Apparently I kept telling people I was a pro tennis player again...
It's been decided..lingerie is an investment. You get free breakfast and cab rides out of it.
The horrors my penis has endured I wouldn't wish upon any man.
Ong my arms are moving wo my consent
The lady at Walgreens was all excited my pregnancy tests had a coupon.
He's rapping about a turtle neck sweater. Please come get me.
I had a 10 minute conversation with the refrigerator, it was telling me how it likes to be opened and closed. Ecstasy, I love you.
He sat down, pointed at my Converse and said "I have the same shoes." I thought "I'm going to have sex with you by the end of the night."
Ur wingman ability is causing serious doubt
Ok first off its WAY easier if you are actually here
Yeah. Still not happy that my prof saw a picture of my vag.
It's acceptable to bring him back to my parents house and fuck on the couch right??
You challenged a dog groomer that she couldn't cut human hair ... How's the shaved head
Randomize