Probably should plan this out. Step one: grow stache. Two: get trenchcoat. Three: Kidnap Selena Gomez.
I had better be fucking involved with step four.
I just need to know if he's either really genuine about being in my life or being in my vagina.
Did everyone make it back alive?
You say that with such hope.
Is that a no?
im celebrating the fact lent is over and i can give blow jobs again.
I will miss his soup and his dick the most
This taco party has no tacos, just a hot asian guy in booty shorts. We were lied to.
Update: it wasn't just our driver. This ticket confirms that the Royal Oak PD also found our behavior on the party bus to be "Lewd and Indecent."
Had sex and ran 2.8 miles all before 7:30am. This is going to be a very productive Monday.
I've already agreed to hook up with 3 people tonight, and its not even 2:00 yet... I think this is what the path to success looks like.
Names, who you're caught in bed with, both minor details
He called from a stranger phone to say. He was a t a liquior store and there was a long line they have no condoms. This is the guy i was gonna go on a date with
Atleast he is letting you know he will be late
You have better ratings than Crest. Only 4/5 dentists recommend it. You have 8/9 recommendation for your blowjob skills.
she started chasing me through the forest like a horny serial killer
This is the perfect outfit to do ketamine in, I must say
Omg, new summer goal: sex in a bouncy castle.
Randomize
