Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
If last night was a website it would be called poordecisions.com OR uncircumcisedspanishweiner.org
its like an ocean threw up right in your lap
$3 wine plus diet sprite does not make good champagne.
does taste better than andre tho
You know what is really helpful - when the two guys you want to fuck stand next to each other. Stay tuned for who wins
as soon as I walked into work this morning, my boss called me out on my hangover, patted me on the back and said I'm getting time an a half for even showing up. Did I really look that bad this morning?
booty call hours are between 1:30-3:00 AM thurs-sat with the exception of major drinking holidays and election days. please try again
If you like her enough, bring her with. If not, eloquently cunt punt that bitch through the field goals of life.
Nothing says "I support my fellow man" like taking your friends recently divorced dad to a strip club and bar hopping with us to get him laid by an upgrade.
Drinking Hot Toddies on the Porch and blasting bob dylans "hurricane" bring it on sandy!
His flight is delayed. Mother Nature is delaying me from sex.
I just won 200$ from Bar Karaoke, for singing the "Sailor Moon" theme song, and then the Pokemon theme song, also known as the motherfucking ANTHEM OF POKEMON MASTERS LIKE ME. I HAD TO REPRESENT.
you made cordon bleu at 4am and declared you were Marshall Stewart
I specifically remember rubbing my eyes thinking I could definitely go blind and I really like came to terms with it I was like ok my other senses will develop this is fine
Holy shit he’s stupid hot! If you don’t hurry up and make a move my ovaries are going to march over there and introduce themselves
Randomize
