we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
no, i will not be your spotter when you masturbate with a noose around your neck
a man that wears gold spandex underwear and party boys other people is a man after my own heart.
In the middle of blowin me she stoppped and told me how easy it would be to insert a catheter ..... Apparently she was a nursing major
He kept yelling "osteoporosis" and threw milk at her because she broke her arm.
i wont go near him until the smell goes away , and he takes the chex mix box off his head.
my dad just asked me if my booty call guy that comes over at 3am and leaves at 6 would like to stay for sunday brunch next week. you in?
Its not even real halloween yet. This extremely toxic yet briliant costume is going to kill me
We ended up at a lesbian bar and all my co-workers tried to get me laid. This is not how I envisioned coming out.
We accept all of your sexual lovers, Jewish, episcopalian, atheist. Dick is dick
This is why we can never be together. Well that and we r married to other ppl but that's very minor detail compared to the coffee issue
The CEO is on this whole 'what do you do with your spare time?' kick. Umm... get drunk and have sex in bar parking lots.
Well, I wish you luck on finding out who your boyfriend is
Just woke up with only a scarf and my uggs on. i hate partying naked in winter.
You know you have a good math teacher when we're talkIng about mixture problems and no one gets it until he explains it by talking about mixing alcohol
Randomize