Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
i crushed up some extenze and put them in his protein powder - should make for an interesting gym experience
i sneezed during and he said it felt like i gave birth to his dick...then asked me to do it again.
47 days without vaginal penetration. Im pretty sure it's grown over.
Do you realize that if your cunt was a missing person it would be assumed dead?
I just took a shit in a BP station. It seemed appropriate since they are shtting in our ocean.
I think I'm going to wait until after Halloween to call off the wedding. No need to ruin my favorite holiday.
He's sobering up. It was really bad for like 45 minutes. He cried while telling me how he pictured us eating hotdogs on the beach together.
You act like pregaming preseason hockey is a crime. Come on man, get fucked up and watch pucks. It rhymes so well it has to go together. DOS EQUIS Y DEVILS!
I'll be on pinterest all night planning crafty things to do with my cats in 10 years.
I'm the brains and you're the boobs of this operation.
I managed to get through my meeting without throwing up in someone else's office, so there's that for an accomplishment today.
I fucked him twice and then he set me up with his teammate. This kid does wonders for me
I deleted all traces of him from my phone
even the dick picks he sent you?
no are you nuts? saved that shit to my camera roll
Is it just me or is it like a girl gets married and all of a sudden she’s a “blogger”?
If she didn't have scissors in her hand I would have motor boated the fuck out of her when she was done cutting my hair.
Randomize