Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
I'll bet she douches with gravy.
I used the word aforementioned in my paper. That's an automatic A in community college.
I woke up to three texts telling me to "go fuck myself," a panicked voicemail from my mom, and a girl thanking me... I'm not sure which I should take care of first
Just threw the poptarts. Sgits boutta go Down. 1 liter of wine
So on how many levels of wrong is it that I'm reconsidering my divorce simply because I don't want to go through getting used to shitting around someone again.
Whiskey + Water + Crystal Lite does NOT = refreshing summer time drink.....
he couldnt get it up, so i stole his lighter. i needed to have some reason to say the night wasnt wasted
Apparently I texted my high school english teacher asking her to tell me what logical fallacies she taught us three years ago.
Go forth Daniel, drink, be merry... And meet some hot Asians for your friends to bang
This drunk lesbian I just met keeps trying to shove sushi in my mouth. Help.
my only goal for the semester is never go to my wednesday class sober
"Accidentally" bump into him after class.
I'm gonna "accidentally" put his dick in my mouth.
At least you got some excitement going on, you got weed and might die tonight, I'm just sitting here bored as fuck.
I CAN'T FALL IN LOVE WITH SOMEONE WHO HAS A LISP. I JUST CAN'T.
Randomize
