he is so annoying
so stop sleeping with him
yeah but he is so hot when i'm drunk
i feel like an archaelogyst. im pulling apart last weeks brownies to find the weed in them
just because you are in college doesnt mean its okay to pregame easter mass.
What is wrong with this kid? He'll take ecstasy but won't take dayquil?
it's like russian roulette but with a penis
I've also hijacked your can opener. Sadly not for the same sexual reason as the muddler.
All I remember was after sex she kept trying to take pictures of my dick "for memories"
i was mezmorized. she was the most beautiful girl that looked like a boy i ever seen
Flaming shots last night. Missing an eye brow. There a connection?
I wish you could take over my body and feel what my nipple feels like right now
I'm just waiting for the avalanche of beef.
"what's it like being a dancer turned stoner" well, i can change the netflix using my feet mid bongrip, so there's that.
On the upside, no one went to the hospital! Lex's friend was definitely on fire at one point last night though because he tried to juggle tiki torches. He was shirtless this morning and smelled like a BBQ.
I got so drunk I thought my tennis court was a corn field so I laid in it and ate pizza
Convinced if I was being murdered in my house no one would come and save me. If no one heard my 10000000 orgasms last night, there is no hope.
Randomize
