dude I heard her through my door. She sounded like you were holding her head under water and they letting her up for air. I recorded that shit
I didn't mean to leave you there I just didn't know him well enough to throw up in his bathroom.
I just paid a homeless man $20 for the dragon ball Z shirt he was wearing. I need to stop drinking
I don't even want to talk about it, I'm traumatized. Even the dog knew to take advantage of the most intoxicated girl at the party...
No, we have matured. We've stopped having sex in front if his room mate.
Yes I want to fuck your friends but it's out of respect and love for you.
i'm drinking whiskey out of a ziplock bag in a movie theater. i'm THAT girl.
I'm glad we're going to catch up. too bad it's over my vagina.
Ok. Here's the plan. Take your hand (whichever is closest), summon all your nerve, and just stick it right down his pants.
I love you.
Jacked up my neck and shoulder hanging on for dear life while I rode him like a boss. Plus my house smells like broccoli, bad! How's YOUR morning?
I only had ten dollars. So leave it to Katie to somehow makeout with the bartender, on his shift mind you, and get free drinks.
Can I tell you that I just incorporated the spice girls in my sexting and you not judge me
Honestly and this might sound scary... But I want to get high and play with weapons
He told me we shouldn't hang out because it would be weird and then snap chatted me a picture of his dick
I pack a first-aid kit when I DD for you. What does that tell you about your partying? For what I see and do, paying my food and gas for the night is a goddamn BARGAIN.
Randomize
