Nope it's him. He's whispering to himself and buying asparagus.
I'm pretty sure it all started going downhill last night when they suggested I see how much sambuca I could fit in my mouth
He apologized for his naked psychotic episode and then we had goodbye sex on his sailboat
Just had a tv talk show interview in my mirror. Got into to some pretty heavy shit man, would have made good viewing.
I'm. Arresyed bur sierra ue obbe of mt vet friends. I hope we can tyajk ane gwt ob the same page. Ur aweaome ttyl.
I don't think it counts as a walk of shame when it's someone you've wanted for 4 years. That's mission accomplished.
next photo in the 'cherished memories' series- Jess's bed. Note the vomit actually UNDER the pillows. shes a genius.
U were yelling that I wasn't generous or supportive. Then you kneeled and said this weird prayer about the windows and doors of your life.
Gave him an awesome blow job on his living room couch last night, so at least he'll have something nice to think about next time he's watching the Tigers lose.
In the mean time, I'll continue to kick ass at running and become a successful stripper while he might hook up with one average looking girl he met at a club. I so win.
Our Tuesday night drunk Irish step dancing was on point tonight.
I just googled "creative ways to tell someone you'll give them a blow job". I'm losing my touch.
only I would find a long lost relative through a craigslist casual encounters ad
I was supremely disappointed in the lack of dick and doughnuts in my life last week.
Of course my parents remember you. You showed them your tits
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