I hope no one judges me for becoming a facebook fan of "Adderall" at 5:49 AM...
pregamed for the floor meeting. so stoned. i keep thinking my RA is shrinking.
If you value my life, if you value your own, please look for that godforsaken cookie. Please.
My last google search of the night was "Things that cost $102.50"
Well I'm drunk and covered in baby oil so tonights not ideal
He told me he deactivated his facebook because his girlfriend caught him wackin it to my profile picture.
10 points to you
Dude, we apparently put a washing machine drum in that back of your truck with the full intention of making a bonfire in it.
Waking up in a NH rest stop and reading through my texts is definitely a familiar low
I just finished a four mile round trip walk to CVS to buy shaving cream and lube. You're welcome.
"I'm pretty sure all our toasts were to Ben Afflecks penis last night."
Out of all the things you could eat off of my tits you choose lettuce? Thats so healthy. Yuck.
Just don’t be like me and break up between Christmas and NYE and then get blackout on NYE and puke in your undies.
So what your saying is you dont remember trying to hit a golf ball off my chest with a 9 iron?
He tried to eat me out...through my pants.
um care to explain the stolen chinchila under greg's bed..i'd be fine with it if it wasnt chewing up the stash
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