Dude you just kept yelling "She was my first asain!" right in front of her.
A small cock is a small cock, don't blame the size of my hands
"auto-tuned camel" is how i'd describe the noises she made
At what point did we agree that playing bocchi ball on the way to the liquor store was a good idea?
Numbies before the dentist, such a good idea.
His little brother just walked in, asked me if I'd blown his brother yet and then announced that he and his friends were going to play outside so we could play too.
He is making me drink his THC water out of a milk jug.
we started the countdown to drunken sledding this weekend.
I like you as a friend, but I'm in love with your dick.
Well his ex just grabbed his dick and told him yep Ill call u later
started my period, we have to try again next week
if we have anymore sex before that my dick is gonna fall off. that is in no way a complaint
Just set up my first threesome: a rapper and a Marine. Pretty sure at least 80% of girls in America hate me right now.
In other news I may have fractured my masturbating arm
At least it wasn't your drinking arm
Is it a bad thing for a seven year old to call one an alcoholic? Asking for a friend..
What the hell happened to the sandwich meat I just bought?
After you smoked, you made 8 ham sandwiches.
Guess that explains the mysterious disappearance of the bread...
Randomize