is it gross that my labia hangs so much that guys can't find my clit?
...seriously? chocolate pudding? motorboating? No one has even done that to ME and i am 69 times the whore you are
We walked because you started screaming when you finally realized he wasn't Ben Bailey and it wasn't the Cash Cab.
Five girls, one freshman pledge. We're like our own Make A Wish Foundation.
I felt weird they were both staring at me waiting for the scoop on how your vagina felt.
It's sore actually
I love how I just got my coachella ticket and ecstasy in a package deal.
It's pretty bad that I know he's opening his door from the way it squeaks because I have snuck out of his room so many times this semester...
Handicvap rails on the toilet atre soooooo fuckin handy right nmow.
If your wondering why there is a puddle on the floor is I may have decided to make a kiddie pool in your living room.
I just walked in on my lesbian roommate having sex in the kitchen, and it was awesome. We proceeded to shots naked together. Happy birthday to me.
I am a murderer. I ran over so many baby frogs. I wanted to stop and pick some up to take home, but all I have is a wine bottle. I'd hate to explain that to a cop.
There really needs to be a redbox for wine because I want some but too lazy to walk into a store
Yeah. I don't know. I'm just gonna show up at her place on valentines day with a jock strap, box of chocolates, and rose clenched between my ass cheeks with "be mine" written across my glorious man titties.
pizza hut and my weed lady just showed up at the same time. I feel 22 again.
Woke up in my boxers on a subway with a phone number written on my arm in lipstick..Best Night EVER.
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